Winter assessment

This is a process that will help you lean into each area of your life and decide for yourself whether (or in what respects) it is nourishing or draining you. As with any tool, please take what serves you and modify or adapt as you wish.

The goal is to be able to take the information and knowing you get from charting out and feeling into each area of your life so you can bring your life further into balance and alignment with your values.

Remember to approach this with beginner’s mind. Your monkey mind / ego will want to take over this work, and you can give your left brain a wide berth for the first few steps of this process, but once you start the work of “leaning in,” you will want your intuition to lead.

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When is suffering productive?

[This is for Hank Norman.] One of my favorite tweeters recently sent out a provocative little about knowing the difference between harmful suffering and that which is part of the growth process. What’s his secret? I don’t know. He’s being awfully tight-lipped about it </joke>, but I have my own answer! I have so Read more…

#AdoptMent youth take personal stock

I’ve been reticent to blog about my work with the AdoptMent group because they’re a younger set and I’m more protective of their privacy. This is a transitional year, not just within the program, but also in the lives of each of these young people. In my first session with them this school year, we returned to the tasks of adolescent development, but instead of focusing broadly on the topic of identity, this time we talked about personal values and relationships, especially how to strike a healthy balance between independence and connectedness.

Last spring I used Zits comics to get the conversation started. We returned to two strips that dealt specifically with identity exploration, and was really pleased that they all retained the biggest lesson from last spring’s identity self-portrait activity, namely that at this early stage in life staying true to yourself is overrated, and identity crises are actually a healthy part of psychological development.

From that group review, everyone paired off with their mentors to discuss comic strips treating the developmental tasks related to autonomy, relationships, and values. The mentors had handouts that indicated the tasks displayed in each strip, but the mentees first had to work on inferring the topic from the material. The second step in the exercise was to reflect on how they were progressing in each of those tasks. I got to eavesdrop on a lot of wonderful stories about how these young people set up challenges for themselves (e.g., earning the money and planning transportation for a solo trip to New Jersey), and noted how their relationships to their parents were in transition

The final part of the workshop had everyone select one particular developmental task that posed a significant challenge to him or her. (more…)

Decision-making with an #emergingleader

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Emerging Leader Maurice came into office hours last week wearing his red power tie. Our initial plan was to unpack his “hustle” from the Work On Purpose workshop we did in our last Emerging Leaders meeting, but he announced that he wanted to share some “good news” and a “dilemma,” which were in fact related. It turned out that Maurice needed to choose between two very different housing options that each appealed to conflicting values, and the decision was overwhelming him. With his permission, I’m sharing some of the details of our meeting because it contains an exercise that might prove useful to the young people you work with (or to you yourself, if you’re in the market for a decision-making tool).

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Learning to be clairvoyant

NOTE: This is my first post as a guest blogger to Minds On Fire. I write at Cartesian Faith about mathematics, data analysis, and management science.  Sometimes I post pictures as well. My focus here will be about applying analytical thinking to improve life skills, such as decision making and Read more…