As I was working through my “stuff” a few years ago, I would periodically ask to see my Shadow. It’s a good skill to hone, being a shadow whisperer. As with feral cats, the shadow must be coaxed persistently yet gently. It always appears of my asking, but in its own timing. And no matter how self aware I think I am, its form is always unexpected. (After all, I would have long ago dealt with it if I knew what I was dealing with.)

It recently struck me, however, that in all these years I never truly asked to see my light. I certainly danced around the question. One year my manifestation mantra was “to see myself through the eyes of Love,” which is kinda the same but not. I think what I was asking then was to see what the Big Deal was. The answer to that prayer was a beautiful lesson in self love. It wasn’t about listing qualities I valued in myself or recognizing how amazing I was. Instead, I learned to hold space for myself like never before.

Asking to see my light feels a bit different now. There is no longer the motivation of healing. This is wholing. It isn’t driven by a sense of lack, but of curiosity. I don’t want the jargon. I truly want to know what it means to be made of light. I want to know what it means when the prayer that emerges from the center of my being is to anchor my light here on Earth. Where does this impulse come from? What does it feel like? And what does it look like in practical terms when this happens?

If you, too, are curious about your light, and if the time feels right, go ahead and ask to know it. Feel the energy of the question in the very center of your being. It might even move you to tears. Then send the question out to whomever you feel connected—God, your Higher Self, the Universe. I often send questions out into the ether. Release it ever so lightly because desperation just keeps you stuck on the question end of the loop that connects you automatically to the answers. Then with open heart and open mind train your awareness ever so gently, ever so lightly to whatever comes to you in the ensuing weeks. I would love to hear what comes up!


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